What's Up?

Well, life has been barreling along--as it does--and it's been dragging us along with it! We're nearing the start of a new school year and Drew is once again starting a new job. In fact, those two events are closely related. Drew's new job is working in the kitchen at the Brooklyn Prospect Charter School, specifically their middle and high school. It's quite a departure from restaurant work, but he will finally have a schedule that matches his family's. We'll have full weekends together! He doesn't have to work holidays! He and I can go out on dates again! The excitement is palpable. No doubt it'll be an adjustment for him--I suspect the cussing will have to lessen--but we all need a good challenge now and again.



Deston is starting fourth grade this year. The closer he gets to the tween years, the more panicky I get! Like Donny, I'm out of my element. I'm only barely grasping the fact that he's nearly done with elementary school. Look out for the post in 2017 where I talk about crying at his fifth grade graduation. Last year Deston was officially diagnosed with ADHD. It's a relief to have a concrete reason behind his learning and behavioral problems. We're so fortunate that his school provides so many resources and support for his needs. He goes to therapy at school and we're exploring supplemental therapy outside of school. There's a lot of ADHD in my family (and probably Drew's, though not diagnosed), so it's not terribly surprising. Still, dealing with him, especially as relates to school, is frustrating and stressful. School has always been stressful for him. One of my biggest parenting regrets is not trying to get to the root of his issues in school sooner. Kindergarten was a nightmare and if I had been more proactive I think we could have identified and started addressing his problems then. But, as I know now, there's a major learning curve to having a kid in school for the first time. At least for me, anyway. I'm a more confident parent now and Deston is finally getting help where he really needs it.

Deston enjoys a nice glass of
red wine. JK! Just being goofy.

Trying to help Deston organize himself is teaching me a lot about how I approach my own life and work. Teaching Deston is helping all of us work together more effectively. The parallels I see between Deston and Drew's behavior are astounding. I won't lie--when Deston has lost track of the instructions I gave him for the third time and Drew has once again put the measuring cups away in the wrong place, I feel like I'm living in ADHD hell. But, if I change my perspective, there are a lot of opportunities for us to all understand each other better and work toward a calmer home life.

Being three is not easy.

Lucinda has just moved to the three year old classroom at her daycare. She moved a few weeks before her third birthday, and was more than ready. She was the oldest one in her two year old room and was getting bored. Before she moved there was sporadic napping and some pushing of the littler kids. So far the three year old room is providing plenty of stimulation. Drop-off is still full of clinging and tears, but such is life. Lucinda is very verbal--she talks almost constantly and tries out new words all the time. "Usually" is the latest one. She's very much Deston's shadow and likes to parrot him and go take toys out of his room. She's getting pretty good on the little scooter and is really into pretend play with her dolls and other figurines. She's way more independent about taking care of herself than Deston was. She can mostly dress herself, including putting her shoes on. We're solidly in the "I can do it myself" phase. It's a double-edged sword!

This reminds me of when Deston
was three and he'd say,
"Only milk can calm me down."

I'm excited for fall. This summer was not as full of fun and relaxation as I wanted it to be and I'm ready to schedule weekend excursions now that we have Drew home with us. I see a lot of hiking, museums, and exploring in our near
future!